Ask Frankie: English Paints, Moving from Hunters to Jumpers, & Husbands at Barn Parties

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Will My Paint & I Fit In at an English Barn?

Name: Angie R.
Location: FL
Horse: Paint Mare
Discipline: Western/Trail
Rider Age: 19

Hi Frankie, I used to ride jumping horses when I was younger, but I couldn’t compete with the wallets of my co-riders. Later, I found a pleasure barn with less competition (leading to cheaper riding), and that made my parents a lot happier. Now, I have a paint mare that I ride mostly on trails and do some games with her, but I have an opportunity to move to an English barn. I’m scared of getting judged and treated poorly. They are nice now, but will they stay that way?

Frankie Sez:
Frankie Holsteiner Ask Hey there Angie; in regards to that nice mare you got there, pictures are always welcome for the Frank’s personal collection.

I say you might be playin’ with fire there, Angie. Being an equid who has lived in English barns his entire life I can say that, well, every move you make is judged. That’s the name of the game, or so they say.

But why should you care if them other bipeds are judging you? Go there, ride western, ride english—hell—just ride. The Frank thinks if you ride, you’ll probably be doin’ more horse related activities than them. Last time the Frank checked, the perfect hair net had nothin’ to do with ridin’.

Kristine Sez:
They will get sour, no doubt. But as long as you are there to ride, you’ll be fine.
Ask Frankie anything. He’s friendly, but he might bite. >>>

Will Going from Hunters to Jumpers Ruin My Horse?

Name:Tanya
Location: CO
Horse: 9yr Oldenburg Gelding
Discipline: Hunter/Jumper
Rider Age: 30

Hi Frankie, I LOVE YOU! You are just like this jumper horse that used to be at my barn, and he was so awesome. My horse is pretty great, but I have a problem. I’ve been showing in the Adult Amateur Hunter classes, and that’s what my current horse, Rasta, was purchased for. But I’m getting the itch for something more. I have always been scared to jump big, and Rasta has been a great confidence builder. He has the talent to do jumpers, I know it, but my trainer says it will ruin him. Is that true?

Frankie Sez:
Frankie Holsteiner AskThe Frank thinks Rasta is a fitting name for a Colorado horse. Those new laws regarding that green stuff and everything. Makes for calmer bipeds at horse shows, I say.

And the dread locks too. Boulder.

Anyhoo Tanya, you think maybe that handsome awesome horse you used to know might have been the Frank? You know, the Frank was a CO resident for some time. But then again, had you met the Frank, we both know, you would not have forgotten the Frank.

Your trainer lacks the knowledge of equid cross training. See, since us dumbloods been tourin’ the hunter ring, we’ve been cross trained for the jumpers. I hear back in the day, if they weren’t pretty or calm, they went to the jumper ring.

These days, Tanya, that just ain’t the case. Trainers think an equid can only do one job. Maybe find a new trainer, or just tell yours that you’re moving to jumpers, like it or not.

Kristine Sez:
It’s your money and your horse. Unless there is a safety or soundness issue, there is no harm in trying to go big.
Ask Frankie anything. He’s friendly, but he might bite. >>>

How Do I Not Embarrass My Wife at Her Barn Party?

Name: Dave
Location: North
Horse: I Forget
Discipline: Expensive
Rider Age: My Wife

Hey there Frank, I’ve been supportive in my wife’s riding, well, since we met, but I’ve never been included in the whole thing. I’ve wanted to get more involved, but I went to a show once and she thought I was bored and never invited me again. Anyway, she invited me to a barn party that’s happening in a few weeks. I guess there’s a band, drinks, dinner, and who know what else. I really want to make a good impression. Any suggestions?

Frankie Sez:
Frankie Holsteiner Ask Dave, you have come to the right place. The Frank is an expert at good impressions and parties. So I’ll get you all set up here:

First, you gotta look snazzy. The Frank suggests jeans and maybe a cool t-shirt. My lady dresses Ace, her guy, up in kitty t-shirts. I’m told he’s all the rage downtown. So maybe go find you a nice t-shirt with a cat doing something that bipeds find smart, and don’t tuck it in. You should be lookin’ tip top.

Also, show sheen. I’m just sayin’, a little shine goes a long way.

Dave, the Frank thinks you should also use this band to your advantage. You should most definitely sing a song to the entire party. Maybe a cover, but you know, spice it up. The Frank loves a good Fleetwood Mac tune, how about somethin’ like:


Thunder only happens when the horses run.
Players only love you when you got yourself a horse to ride.
They say, horses, they will come and they will go.
When you jump a clean round, you’ll know
You’ll know.

You just can’t go wrong with Stevie Nicks, Dave. Home run. The Frank thinks you’ll probably get lucky too. That’s a bonus.

Good luck, boss.

Kristine Sez:
Follow your wife’s lead. Have fun, loosen up, and remember going in: horse people are crazy.

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Ask Frankie anything. He’s friendly, but he might bite. >>>

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ABOUT AUTHOR

Equestrian author, rider, and horse advocate Kristine Oakhurst has performed every equestrian related job there is from being a groom, vet tech, stall cleaner, catch rider, barn manager, trainer, and even board member for a breed committee. Her first novel about a discarded ex-racehorse and homeless 16 year old girl has just been published. [Checkout Tall Omaha at Amazon]